The Wind Beneath My Wings: A Three-Generation Story of Strength

Part of the Family & Legacy Series

When a Song Becomes Your Story

You know that moment when you're listening to a song and it just hits you right in the heart?

A while back, I was in a melancholy mood, thinking about how my mom won't be with me forever. The thought of losing my best friend, my champion, my mom—it overwhelmed me. That's when Bette Midler's "Wind Beneath My Wings" came on, and I knew I had to send it to her.

"This is what I think of you, Mom," I told her. "This is our song now."

She keeps losing it somewhere in her computer files and asking me to send it again. The cycle repeats, but I don't mind. Because it's true—she has been the wind beneath my wings all my life.

(On a side note, my husband has sustained that faith and love in my life too, but today's story is all about my mom.)

Granny: The Force of Nature

To understand my mom, you need to understand where she came from. Let me tell you about my granny.

My grandmother was one of 13 children—not unusual for those days—but she was the middle child and the oldest daughter. And she was a force to be reckoned with. She essentially ran the household, managing all her siblings with remarkable efficiency.

When the Depression Hit

When the Depression came, they lost the farm. This was a common story, but what happened next wasn't typical at all. Instead of heading to the factories like most folks, my grandparents started hustling.

Picture this: farm folk in the city, starting completely over. I've always believed my grandma was the driving force. She was one of those incredible women who could:

• Cook and cater entire weddings
• Sew bridesmaids' and brides' dresses
• Create stunning flower arrangements
• Decorate the most beautiful cakes you've ever seen

They started by selling pies and cakes at factory entrances during lunch and dinner breaks. Then Granny expanded into buying suits for ladies and gentlemen, going door-to-door to sell them—and she did all the alterations herself.

Here's the thing that still makes me smile: Granny eventually refused to sell pies in front of the factory. "What would people say if they saw me selling pies when I'm a dressmaker now?" she'd say. She was always evolving, always reaching higher.

Mom: Following in Strong Footsteps

My mom was a typical young woman of her era. She completed her secretarial training and became a whiz at typing and shorthand. (Shorthand, for those wondering, was a form of rapid writing using symbols—the precursor to today's note-taking apps!)

After she married my dad, my grandparents decided to move to Namibia to run her brother's general store in Okahandja—a small town about an hour from Windhoek, the capital. At that time, Namibia was still South-West Africa and heavily influenced by its German colonial past.

A Magical General Store

My grandmother's store was magical. She sold her designer hats, shoes, clothes, food—anything your heart desired. The German influence was everywhere, and my mom had to learn German since everyone spoke it. (My dad's mother was German, born in Mozambique, so it was more natural for him.)

After several moves between South Africa and Namibia, my mom started working at the bank. Looking back now, most of the women I knew growing up worked or had vocations. I grew up surrounded by strong women—I just didn't realize how extraordinary that was at the time.

The Shadow Behind the Strength

But there's a harder truth I need to share, because it makes my mom's strength even more remarkable.

My dad was an alcoholic who abused her terribly. Not regularly, but when he was drinking, the fights would start and escalate. I remember being 11 or 12 years old, driving to fetch him out of the bar in our small town. (I have no idea how I got away with driving at that age—probably because I was tall.) Then the "drama," as I called it, would happen.

I think the reason the drama never really was a regular thing was because of my granny. She was the only one who could "handle" my dad in his drunken state. She was 5' nothing and he was over 6' tall, and she would bully him to stop. There was a lot going on behind closed doors, but that's not the story I want to tell now. Living close to or near my grandparents probably also gave my mom huge support during those difficult times.

We usually lived near or with my grandparents. When my grandpa died, my granny moved into a granny flat we built onto our house. She was always part of my life—though I didn't always appreciate it, especially when I had to help with sewing, catering, cooking, and church events.

Learning by Living

At 16, I sewed my own dress for our big sports dance. I'd already knitted my own cardigans and hats, and decorated cakes for church events. I absorbed my grandmother's creativity even when I didn't appreciate the lessons.

I was away at boarding school most of my teen years, but I knew that my mom often had to carry the family financially when my dad would lose his job because of his drinking, or wouldn't go to work because of remorse for abusing her. It was a terrible, destructive pattern.

But Here's What I Remember Most

Throughout all of this, I never remember my mom being a victim.

She was incredibly active in the community. She played tennis. She joined a shooting club and won championships in both. And she always—always—tried to create a safe environment for us kids.

Coming Full Circle: Giving Back and Giving Forward

Years later, after a lot of traveling and life experience, I got the opportunity to support women in Namibia. I didn't hesitate.

Although it started as just a business, it became something more. I wanted to give back to the strong women who shaped me. I wanted to give forward the resilience, creativity, and determination I learned from watching my grandmother build a life from nothing, and from watching my mom remain unbroken through everything life threw at her.

They were—and my mom still is—the wind beneath my wings.

What strong women in your family have shaped who you are today? Share your story in the comments below.

This is part of our Family & Legacy series, where we explore the generations of strength, creativity, and resilience that inspire our work today.